sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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