At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize
