you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
How drunk are you?
Completed.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
