i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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