You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
