A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
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I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
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Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
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