At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
