Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
