Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
A reply to my tweet is getting more likes than mine, the disrespect is real
Randomize
