i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
