google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
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