you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
I am available for nakedness
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize
