so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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