Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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