my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
