I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
