Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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