..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize