What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
i've created a new STD.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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