Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
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