The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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