doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
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