hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
Randomize
