my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize
