Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
