I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.