Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
