1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
home. puking in laundry basket.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I'm like, not good at living.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
