Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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