I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize
