Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
