Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
