Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
