he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
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if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
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I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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