You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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