please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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