clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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