I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
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