after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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