is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
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