I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize