so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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