Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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