I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
