Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Randomize
