He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
