I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
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