oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize