He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
