We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
