I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Randomize
